Not gonna lie I spend 86% of my time imagining different scenarios in my head

ofsherlock:

ofsherlock:

tumblr spelt backward is rlbmut and if you put it in google translate it would change it to rummut which in finnish means drums and if you translate drums into chinese it says 鼓 which also means kettle and a kettle is hot and what else is also hot? yes that’s right HELL coincidence? i think noT

guys come on i researched things on google translate for this

fabulousunicorns:

seabsie:

did someone say

cute boys

lets play “how rude can i be until u realize i dont like u”

penis2bomb:

p1ssblog:

I want a list of everyone who has ever masturbated to me

dude-thats-my-ghost:

askgeorgebush:

fridge-logic:

askgeorgebush:

What if the Doctor’s name is just something like

Phil

You mean like this

OH

SHIT

mistaken-identities:

fonmasterguard:

So no one at my friend’s old high school is allowed to dress up for halloween anymore because one year this kid came to school on a bike wearing a red jumpsuit with tampons taped to him. He rode around the school telling people he was the menstrual cycle

I love this kid.

lampsarepeopletoo:

they call me macklemore in math class because im like

what what what what what

what what what what what what what

what what what what

soundoffireinthedawn:

loki-0f-asgard:

frankienathanieljonas:

bubblelumps:

was voldemort a virgin

#did you see him in 5th year? #he wasnt a virgin

he was a real whore-crux

WHORE-CRUX

wordswordsworlds:

Those moments where you desperately want to say something but your mind just

chescraft:

that really softens my grunge 

youwishangelfish:

Imagine reading a book of every conversation where people have spoken about you.

p0ndorica:

p0ndorica:

sometimes i see dudes on the internet like “ya i have a 10 inch dick” and then i eat a 6 inch subway sandwich and im looking at this sandwich and its like..idk how almost double that would be a good thing my vagina winces at the thought 

it was 4am and i compared a penis to a sandwich